I don’t remember not ever having that voice in my head. The person that’s constantly having a conversation with me, and me with that voice.
Sometimes it feels like it never stops, and then again, I’d feel lost and scared if I ever did lose it…
It’s like a friend inside my head, an angel and sometimes the devil on my shoulder. A maiden, mother and crone all in one voice, inside my mind.
Is it the gut instinct? The sixth sense? Our ego?
To me, the inner dialogue is a constant reminder of my presence, that I exist in this place. I am never alone, as long as I have me and that inner dialogue.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t sit there cracking jokes to make my inner dialogue laugh, but I can make myself laugh sometimes (like we all do).
My inner dialogue doesn’t very often give me good advice however, and when I’m in need of some words of encouragement, I can count on my inner dialogue – only when I make that conscious choice though.
Our inner dialogue can be a friend, as well as our worst enemy.
Feeling the weight of those negative, sabotaging thoughts.
You’re not good enough.
You can’t go through with that, who do you think you are dreaming this big?
You don’t deserve happiness.
You don’t have what it takes…
When these thoughts are triggered, and sometimes we don’t know where they’re coming from, or why they’re happening, we need to notice the change in thoughts and snap out of it.
We have around 60,000 to 80,000 thoughts a day… Crazy, right? And why can’t one of them be a million dollar idea?
Anyway, the point is that among those 60/80,0000 thoughts, there is going to be one or 2, (or more on worse days) that are negative and sabotaging.
There are a few simple ways to silence the inner dialogue for a while.
Meditation – as this involves completely quietening your mind and all thoughts, closing your eyes and simply focusing on the breath. This stops your inner dialogue from talking, there is nothing to observe and not much to think about so you can have a break from that inner dialogue.
Running and exercise – is also a good one, as your heart rate is up, your body is constantly moving and doing something quickly, which means your brain, ego and inner dialogue aren’t able to keep up or make many observations. You may hear the voice sometimes saying “this is too hard, can’t do this, need to stop now…” You may or may not choose to listen to that voice and stop, or push yourself further.
Yoga – is also another great way to stop the inner dialogue, as it involves lots of breathing which clears the mind, and an exercise that involves constant movement, distracting your inner dialogue.
Napping and sleeping – also works, as you’re in a state of unawareness and unconsciousness so your inner voice cannot get into your dreams, and it’s a nice break from the world and that inner voice.
Gratitude – by reminding ourselves of the things that we’re grateful for each day, our inner dialogue (as well as our fortune) can drastically change. The momentum of our thoughts sways more towards the positive thoughts as we’re constantly driving our thoughts and dialogue towards everything we’re grateful for, rather than what we’re lacking, which can make us feel unworthy, or not quite where we’re meant to be.
Yes, the inner dialogue is our ego having a conversation with itself. It’s the voice within, observing everything we see, and putting thoughts and opinions onto everything that is happening to us, everything that we’re going through internally.
Our internal dialogue is like a lens through which we see the world. If we’re feeling low and sad, our inner dialogue and the ego that is talking, might see things in a negative light too. The world painted in dark colours, causing the inner dialogue to be negative too.
When we’re happy/upbeat, every butterfly and tree looks beautiful and as a result, the lens through which we see the world and our ego, is making kind observations.
Our inner dialogue can be the starting point of our anxiety, stress and depression. If we see the world through the negative lens, our ego responds accordingly, telling us how shit everything is, how much effort every little task is and how it’s easier to do nothing and give up.
The constant reminders of the shitty, gritty reality, drives us into a corner of anxiety and a dark place. It makes every problem appear bigger, as the thoughts and inner dialogue creep in:
I can’t do this.
It’s too hard.
I’m not gonna make it, I’ll just accept that I’m a failure.
I can’t deal with this anymore.
The sabotaging thoughts are just our thoughts that come from a dark place, from our sad ego and are not a reflection of our worth.
To shush those negative thoughts and change our mind’s direction, we have to notice what’s happening, and make the conscious decision to change that lens.
Tell your ego to f off, and tell yourself nice things, compliments and everything you’ve achieved, everything you’re grateful for.
Our brain is naturally swayed towards negative thinking, due to its biological and neurological make up.
We notice negative situations and they’re easily apparent and more noticeable – which is why as a human race we always dwell on the negative, thrive on bad news more than good news, and focus on the bad stuff.
It’s how our brain was designed.
The reason for the design is because of our ancestors – they lived in a world of constant fight for survival. Their survival instinct was stronger than anything, so to help with spotting dangers and possible harmful situations, the brain would naturally spot dangers and negative situations a lot easier, alerting our ancestors to either fight or flight.
Although we as humans have evolved (quite a bit…), our neurological make up of our mind, remains in tact.
However, that doesn’t mean that we should be walking around voicing every negative thing we see and be miserable because of all the dangers we see.
We give in easily, especially when negativity, criticisms is easier to accept the beauty of the world and the positivity around us. This is why we need to make the conscious effort and choice to focus on the positive.
Energy is contagious and by spreading positive thoughts and feeling positive, the energy spreads around your environment and onto other people you speak to.
One by one we can change the world! Just kidding, but maybe…? What if we could?
Anyway, whenever you start to notice your negative observations, make the conscious choice to stop, and turn to positive observations.
List everything you’re grateful for, list all the things that make you happy in this world and everything beautiful you see outside your window.
If you’re unsure of what to say or think to change your train of thought to a positive one, affirmations are a great way to always return to positivity. To turn your inner dialogue into a happy one, you can use the below affirmations:
I love my life and everything in it.
I am happy, grateful and healthy. Today is a good day and the universe is always blessing me with gifts, fortune and more good news.
I embrace the world as it is, I am happy here and I appreciate all the beauty that is around me. Life itself is a miracle, I am a miracle, and my existence in the here and now is a beautiful miracle I am grateful for.
Copyright Toucan Dream 2021